Spare the rod and spoil the child or nature vs. Nurture. What is the best parenting advice that you can get when you have a strong willed child. What I can tell you is dig in and don’t give up. You can make it through. Here are a few reminders in your struggling days of wanting to quit and send them off to boarding school.

More and more I see the children running the home. It is a shame as children need to be taught respect for their elders and to be nurtured while knowing that they cannot get everything they want and should be kind and most of all know they are loved.

The willful years begin around two. Toddlers begin to learn that some things are not okay and they will try to do it anyway. Then they will look at you like saying, “what are you going to do about it”. It has begun and you have a choice to let them know you are or allow the behavior to happen.

Children are great because they just say it like it is. But it’s a job for us parents to teach children to be respectful. Seeing a large lady on the street and calling them fat to their face is cruel. Yes she is over weight, but it also hurt her feelings. Teach children in a positive fashion that it is more important to be kind many times than truthful. Or better yet, not to say anything at all.

If you go to a store or anywhere and buy them something every time you go, guess what? They will expect you to buy them something every time you go to a store. Try teaching them the value of money. Let them spend money by giving them an allowance. They will learn money doesn’t grow on trees. Even if you have money to burn this is a great life lesson to learn. Don’t give your kids a sense of entitlement. Teach them things are earned. The only thing that is free is the love you give them.

Teaching your child to be appreciative is always a good thing. There is nothing like a child who nothing is ever good enough or they want something more. Teach them to appreciate what they have and to be thankful to others.

Teach your children to share, especially you that have only children. It is inbred in us to be naturally selfish. Teach your child that sharing is about giving and not expecting anything in return. And teach them to not back talk to adults. They can respectfully disagree. I remember a kindergartner telling me to “bleep” off when in my child’s classroom. They didn’t learn that from Sesame Street. Set the example for your children so they can be respectful adults.

But bottom line; teach them that they are loved. A child filled with love will have the self esteem to conquer the world. They will have confidence to get through hard times and the courage to face the world as an adult.

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